Archive for December, 2005

Contrary to popular belief, and by popular I mean mine, Parveen is a GIRL’S name. Ms. Parveen would like to clarify that it was not her fault that Mr. Wong has a girlfriend named Micheal, and that she did not, at any time, drink while writing the article. Which is great, but I think she [...]

It’s a good thing it doesn’t snow here in Malaysia, because while I can’t speak for the masses, I know what I’ll be erecting out my front yard, and the cops won’t be too excited about it.

Downpayment for a condominium: RM20,000 Donation to three brothers and other charities: RM10,000 Dream vacation to Japan with girlfriend: RM20,000 Having a girlfriend whose name is “Micheal”: Priceless.

Muhammad Ali reportedly had this conversation once: Muhammad Ali: Superman don’t need no seatbelt. Flight Attendant: Superman don’t need no airplane, either. I used to think I had super powers too, when I was little. My repertoire of moves would include the Supermarket Floor Toss and Roll, which often followed the “I WANT THIS CANDY, [...]

Did you know that it’s the Sultan of Selangor’s birthday today, and that tomorrow will be a public holiday? Well, my wireless router does. The cretin decided to go to hell on vacation today, leaving me to borrow a laptop and hang about in Starbucks looking like a trendy young professional crafting a multi-million dollar [...]

Although, I have mixed feelings about this.

Speaking of cars. Will somebody please explain drag racing to me? No really, that was a rhetorical question, so shut up and listen: Leave drag to RuPaul, OK? Macho men race Formula 1. Macho Pansy Seriously, look at that picture of a drag car. Does it look like a souped-up wheelchair? The correct answer is [...]

Most guys my age dream of Lancers, Evos, MR2s and Drag Race Queens. Not me. I want a Honda. I hear that sex in the City is great, what with the Ultra Seat and all, but what I really want is a Life Dunk, tricked up with a hot coffee mod and doughnut accessories. Or [...]