October 17, 2007
Posted by Kurt
While hunting down some low-down murderous varmints, the Lone Ranger is captured. He manages to whisper a message into Silver’s ear. The horse rears back, whinnies, and charges off to get help in a town many miles away. The bad guys decide to take Loney out into the desert and tie him, naked, to a [...]
October 15, 2007
Posted by Kurt
Little Red Riding Hood’s grandmother is lying in her bed when the wolf bursts through the door and stands above the bed panting. “I’m going to tear you from limb to limb!” growls the wolf. “No you won’t,” replies the grandmother, pulling out a revolver from under the covers. “You’ll do as the story says [...]
October 12, 2007
Posted by Kurt
Down with pants! Up with miniskirts! A sultan was inspecting the quarters of his harem. He opened a closet in one of the bedrooms and let out a terrified sheik. Then there’s the wife who received a postcard from her husband, who was away on a business trip: “Having a wonderful time darling, wish you [...]
Q: How can you tell the clan of a Scotsman? A: You lift up his kilt, and if you see a Quarter Pounder underneath, you know he’s a McDonald. *** Q: What do breasts and electric trains have in common? A: They’re both designed for children, but Daddy gets to play with them. *This has [...]
October 8, 2007
Posted by Kurt
The biblical book of Exodus tells us, “Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s house…nor his ass.” In the Song of Solomon we read, “My beloved put in his hand by the hole of the door, and my bowels were moved for him.” [I expect this will encourage more people to read their Bibles --Kurt] *This [...]
October 5, 2007
Posted by Kurt
Three old ladies went for a tramp in the woods — but he got away. Next morning they caught him, and for the rest of the day their stomachs were on the bum. Next day the three ladies were confronted by a flasher. The first had a stroke, and the second had a stroke — [...]
October 3, 2007
Posted by Kurt
Under 35: Tri-weekly 35-45: Try weekly 45-55: Try weakly 55 and over: Try, try, try. [I first read it as "55 it's over" --Kurt] *This has been today’s selected excerpt from The Cunning Linguist, by Richard Lederer*
October 1, 2007
Posted by Kurt
Rummaging through my library of books over the weekend, I was reacquainted with a charming tome I bought some years back by Dick Lederer (or Richard Lederer, if you want to be prissy about it) called The Cunning Linguist. It’s a “celebration of verbal ingenuity on impolite subjects” that manages to be lewd, outrageous, and [...]
